The Parable of the Computer Apps

Tomorrow I’ll be preaching on Matthew 13:24-30 and I couldn’t help but share a strange retelling of this parable that I was working on, because I’m cracking up at what I wrote.

Since I live in an urban community, I was attempting to modernize Jesus’ farming parable into something more technological. I even called my brother who works with computers for a living and asked him to help me try to fill in some metaphorical gaps here and there. But in the end, I realized my newly redone parable was even harder for people to understand and that I had to ditch the idea altogether! It’s not like the original parable was that confusing in the first place, so I don’t know why I tried to remake it at all. But in case you get a kick out of it, here’s a look at my strange attempts to modernize the passage:

The Original Parable

He put another parable before them, saying, “The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a man who sowed good seed in his field, but while his men were sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat and went away. So when the plants came up and bore grain, then the weeds appeared also. And the servants of the master of the house came and said to him, ‘Master, did you not sow good seed in your field? How then does it have weeds?’ He said to them, ‘An enemy has done this.’ So the servants said to him, ‘Then do you want us to go and gather them?’ But he said, ‘No, lest in gathering the weeds you root up the wheat along with them. Let both grow together until the harvest, and at harvest time I will tell the reapers, “Gather the weeds first and bind them in bundles to be burned, but gather the wheat into my barn.”

The Modernized Attempt

He put another parable before them, saying, “The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a CEO who installed good apps on his computer, but while his computer programmers were sleeping, his enemy came and installed malware among these apps and went away. So when the apps did their work, then the pop-up ads appeared also. And the computer programmers went to the CEO and said to him, ‘Boss, did you not install good apps on your computer? How then does it have malware?’ He said to them, ‘An enemy has done this.’ So the servants said to him, ‘Then do you want us to go and delete them?’ But he said, ‘No, lest in deleting the malware you break the apps along with them. Let both stay together until the upgrade, and at upgrade time I will tell the computer executives, “Gather the malware first and put them in the trash folder to be emptied, but gather the software into the cloud.”

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